Once upon a time there were a city of rock dwellers whose way of life was to cling to the rocks on the bottom of a river. As the current washed over them daily, they held on for dear life making sure to keep clinging so as not to be washed away by the current. So fearful were they of the river that they clung tightly making sure that all their children learnt how to cling on for dear life too.

Until one day, one of the rock dwellers decided that he was tired of this way of life and he announced he was going to let go of the rock to see which way the current of the river would take him. The Rock-Dwellers beseeched him, “Don’t be so stupid. You’ll be killed” and “The river will wash you away” and “You’ll be dashed on the rocks – you cannot predict where the river will take you” and ” do you think you can be so arrogant as to think it won’t happen to you?”

The barrage of warnings were very persuasive. They were right, he didn’t know where the river would take him. He could be killed. Yet so tired was he of dwelling on the rocks he had often wondered what would happen if he let go. But resolute and determined, he decided he would take his destiny into his own hands and release his grip from the rocks.

And he was dashed on the rocks; at times he thought he wouldn’t survive. At times the current took him round rough corners, through shallow waters with sharp rocks and he doubted the wisdom of his actions. However, as the minutes and hours passed, slowly the current raised him up and he started to be able to survey the watery rock dwellers clinging onto their rocks below.

And the sense of freedom that he had and the sense of achievement as he flowed over the city was intense. And the sense of perspective to what was and what wasn’t important, liberating. And as he passed they looked up in awe to see someone who was riding the waters seemingly untouched by hardships and life’s lessons. “Oh how we wished we could do that”, they said now.

But he knew just how much courage and tenacity he’d had to develop to let go and live the way of the River Surfers and not the Rock Dwellers. He knew it was precisely because of his hardships negotiating the rocks and twists of the river that he could soar so apparently effortlessly now on the river. And he vowed he would show others how they could, in turn, learn to flow with life: stopping only to negotiate their biggest obstacles but allowing all others to flow on by.

Are you a Rock Dweller or a River Surfer then? How do you regard the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune? Will you define yourself by what others say, or realise the shortcomings of others’ unwelcome and unwarranted criticism? These are the questions we grapple with on the Assertiveness and Confidence course. Watch out for the audio teleseminars coming soon so you can sample new ways of thinking. The current course is being audio recorded, edited and transcribed as we speak so you can soon buy your own audio course for a fraction of the price of attending the live event.  I’ll keep you posted if you sign up to my newsletter.